One thing that I am learning to be is truly authentic. What does this mean? It means realizing that I'm not perfect and that I never will be. It also means confronting my sin head on and not sweeping it under the rug. Like I wrote earlier I'm not perfect and never will be.
So why is it so hard for people [me] to be truly authentic, because I am human. I am ashamed of the thoughts I have thought, the actions I have committed, the words I have spoken. As humans I think we want to be perceived as perfect or at least put together. No one wants to be vulnerable, or thought of as that girl who does or has done that thing.
One thing I find sad is that I'm more afraid to tell my Christian brothers and sisters about my faults, failures and imperfections then my non-believing friends. I know that I will be judged, before I am loved [in some cases not all]. It kind of sucks trying to deal with sin on my own, but that is why I have Christ. I am saved and He has forgiven my sins BUT, [there it is the BIG but] I need people to hold me accountable. I need a person who is going to look at me with love and say "This isn't right, I love you. I don't think less of you but it has to stop. Where do we go from here?" That right there is what I need folks.
I love my mentors. I have two. They are two ladies from my church. I know that the next time I meet with them it is going to be tough, because I have done somethings I'm not proud of. Like I said a while back I'm not perfect, but that is no excuse. It says in Romans 6:1-3:
"1What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin
that grace may abound? 2By no means! How can3Do you
not know that all of us who have been baptized into
Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? we who
died to sin still live in it?"
After reading this I realize that using the fact that I'm not perfect as an excuse is wrong.
Well, I'm done ranting about my imperfects. This is just the beginning of being truly authentic.
Peace & Love,
S.R.Macke
